My Love Story

My husband was issued boots, BDU's and a gun. He left his home and joined the army, looking for a change and an opportunity. I met him multiple times in 1999, but paid no notice to him until 2000, thanks to some mutual friends.

We had dinner. I brought my child, in hopes to scare him off. I had just been dating a guy, whose temper flared, and had made me swear against dating for a while.

This new guy was different. Quiet. Polite. Quiet. There were no fireworks or stars. Just awkward silence among friends.

The next day, he had to report to the base for work. But something told me not to let this one go. Call it a gut instinct, the sixth sense...intuition.

I fell in love with him over the next few months. It was common knowledge from the beginning that he was to be shipped to Korea in December. I promised myself I would not get too attached. Army guys were a dime a dozen. They would come and go as fast as the wind changed.

I dreamed of him one night. He was standing in his army gear, at an airfield. He gave me a ring. It was really weird.

He left for home in November...that is home in Iowa. I thought we would say good-bye...maybe exchange a few phone calls. And that would be it. Little did I know, as he and his brother left me and my friend in downtown Nashville, my heart broke. You know...that can't catch my breath, choked up, don't talk to me or I will just lose it heart break. He would leave Iowa for Korea...a year long tour. When he got home to Iowa, I think his heart was breaking as mine was. He told me he loved me for the first time over the phone during that time. I was desperate to see him, just one last time. What if this was my love...my one true love leaving for overseas...and I just let him go.

I kept trying to plan a weekend meet up somewhere halfway between Iowa and Tennessee. I was in college, and weekends were my only "down time". But his family kept him busy and it seemed almost impossible. It looked hopeless. Then he called and asked me what I as doing on Dec 11. That was a Wednesday...during finals. I was bummed, as I told him I had finals. He then told me that he would be flying out to Korea, through Nashville, with a layover in Nashville, from the 11th to the 12th. If I wanted to see him, he would be at the airport...waiting.

Funny story here. He was as desperate to see me as I was to see him. As he and his mother went to the travel person to arrange flights, they were returning from town, and they saw a Buck chasing a Doe in a field. One of them noted how funny that was. Then his mom said, "Well at least the Buck isn't going to Tennessee to get it." =)

Of course I saw him that night, and saw him off the next day. Saying good-bye at the gate (back before Sept 11), putting on a brave face... I don't truly know if I was more sad for my loss of him, or of his loss of his family, friends and me. I still had my family and friends. He was journeying into an unknown world... alone.

I decided, I would rather have him this way, than to not have him at all. I knew from early in life that there was more to my future than what my town had to offer. What if this was it? I vowed to give our relationship a chance to find out.

There were phone calls and letters. He would get leave in June, and planned to come back to the states for 30 days, Just knowing he would be in the country made me happy. I finally asked him what his plans were. Would he visit his family first, come see me, etc. He laughed at me. He said that he was flying into Nashville...and then flying out of Nashville. If I could not take off work, then he would just bum around Nashville for 30 days with me. Although I thought this was a sincere lie, it made me realize how much I meant to him.

I took the whole month off work. It was just a summer job anyway. We went to Iowa for two weeks and then to Florida for a week. When he went to fly out of Nashville, back to Korea, his flight was canceled from Dallas to Korea, so he was able to stay an additional day...we called it "Bonus Time", and since he was suppose to already be gone, we weren't allowed to be sad during "Bonus Time".

He returned to Korea, with the decision to re-enlist to come back to Ft. Campbell, KY, to be close to me. Then September 11 happened. He did return to Kentucky, but spent the next year training for Operation Iraqi Freedom. The ups and downs were exhausting. His coming and going tore at my heart strings. They were packing gear and shipping their stuff via train to ports to be shipped to the Middle East. It was really going to happen. He was going to go to war. I had made it through a Korea Tour, but this was war!

He asked me to marry him early February 2003. I think his family expected us to marry before he left for the war, but we didn't. I needed something to do while he was gone. I needed something to look forward to. We all did.

I had been working a night shift, and I came home and climbed into bed when I got the call. They were shipping out to the Middle East that night. He would be packing part of the day on base, but would be at his apartment that afternoon to finish his personal packing. I drove to the base immediately. Sleeping off the night shift until he came in.

What do you say to someone who is leaving for war? How do you help him pack? How do you not cry all night long? What if he didn't come back? The unselfish thing is what I did. I wanted to make a memory. A happy one. One for him to be able to remember me by. Yes, we were losing him, but he was leaving everything.

I smiled. We laughed. We went to dinner.

I realized as I watched him pack his bags, when he packed a bunch of magazines for his gun, that this was the real thing. We drove separate to the base, and said our good-byes in the parking lot. I drove home. I was sad. But I was proud of how I had made what could have been his last day with me a pleasant one. We would see each other again. If not here in our earthly home, but in heaven if it were God's will. I knew that if he did not come home, he had made me a better person. I would be strong for him.

We would visit through the night sky. I know it sounds dumb, but there was comfort in knowing that the sun, moon and stars were the same ones that shown on him. Even if I could not go to him myself, the stars and moon would soon be with him, and with them, my love.

It was a long year. He came home February 2004. We were given a series of possible dates his plane would arrive, basically putting us on-call for their arrival. When the day came, we had to be at the base at 5 am to catch buses to an airfield. We were at the airfield before the sun came up. We waited, as the sun rose. Then the planes came in. There were two. Hundreds of us lined a short fence barricade, as the planes unloaded. The soldiers were to get off the plane, line up in formation. We were to listen to a short speech, then they would dismiss them to greet loved ones.

There were a couple hundred soldiers at least. They all looked the same. Same BDU's, same hair cuts, same tans. Until they were right up in front of your face, you could not tell if this soldier was your loved one of theirs. The line passed us as families and friends cheered, held signs and waved flags. It was the end of the second plane when he saw me. Before I could register his familiar face, he had dropped his bags and came over and took me in his arms in what I have to admit, was one of the best embraces of my life! I have a photo of that moment somewhere. But I had already seen this image before. Many years ago. In my dream. This was the airfield of my dreams in the early days of our relationship. I didn't want to tell him he was the only one that broke formation to come to me.

He returned to formation. Once they dismissed them, I made my way across the hanger. His helmet was on the floor, where I noticed he had pictures of me and my son taped to the inside of his helmet. He had kept us with him always.

We returned home, and over the next few months, planned the wedding and the big move up north here. Our blended family has been blessed with the addition of Andrew in 2006.

It is easy to forget where we all began. We get so caught up in the everyday problems, and turn them into big problems. We forget the challenges that we have endured to be together. Or at least I do. I wanted to share this with others, as I am reliving these memories as I write them. I think I needed the reminder.


Angie